Exploring

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I had never seen a salamander before and I certainly didn’t expect to see one today, but we found them. Dozens of them swimming down a little stream in the hills that surround my little suburbia. Some of them mating, some of them embracing stillness on little algae covered stones, some ran straight for shelter when we loomed over them in deep curiosity.

Just when I thought there wasn’t anything new to be gained from my hometown, my sister and I discovered this new way of enjoying the backyard of the city. It was beautiful and refreshing. We walked many trails and climbed many rocks and we had no idea where we were going but it was just what I needed: an exploration. A guarantee that wondering in unknown spaces yields opportunities to grow with loved ones and to see the world around me in new ways.

Today was a reminder that it’s okay to not know everything. I didn’t need to know what lay waiting at the end of a given path, the important thing is that I chose one and I explored it, and I was grateful for the walk. I should regard my future the same way. Fear is a tyrant that has starved me my whole life. I’ve been so afraid of following the “wrong” path, or doing one thing and finding I don’t enjoy it later. Being a privileged middle-class white kid, I’ve always had many paths available to me. I should be grateful for this and I should pick one (not recklessly), and pursue what calls me. Maybe it’s been that simple all along. Picking one path does not restrict me from taking others. One door closes and another one opens. Windows of opportunity will always be open for me, it would be a shame not to see what exists within the frame of each one.

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